Vulnerability vs. Victimization – What helps you win in business and in life?

It’s Winning Wednesday again, and it has me reflecting upon how we “show up” to win and how we show up to have every winning circumstance run in the opposite direction!

We all have ups and downs in business and in life. If we’ve invested the time to lay good foundations and supportive environments, those “down” moments aren’t so low or so long, nevertheless, we all have them. I was in a meeting with interacting with people that I’ve known for years, we have some environments in common and frankly, I felt sick and tired. I know that sounds harsh, but I was; I was tired of hearing the whining from the same individuals time and time again. And I asked myself, “What’s the difference between them and everyone else in our common circle who move beyond these defeating beliefs and behaviors?” A DECISION. That’s is, that’s my humble opinion, a DECISION.

We all have vulnerable moments, moments when business is down, when we’re stuck and can’t find solutions easily, when our creativity gets stunted, when the market is down, etc… That does something to us in our inner game, we doubt our competence and can even doubt our self-worth. But it’s human to be VULNERABLE. Sure, one official definition is: “capable of being harmed physically or emotionally.” But what does it really mean? It simply means we’re human. In our transparency and CAPACITY to show that we are vulnerable, we can learn A LOT about ourselves. We are EMPOWERED to show that transparency and seek out the help we might need from our supportive environments. And I firmly believe that, that same vulnerability allows us to connect with others in business and life at deeper levels.

By contrast, when show up as victims, we are DISEMPOWERED. We are incapable of finding solutions because everything that happens “to us” is a result of some outside force, none of the power lies within us. So, why do I say that this causes every winning circumstance to run in the opposite direction? Do you like to be around disempowered people? I sure don’t! It drags me down, it sucks the life out of me, and in all honesty after someone continues to “show up” in the victim suit, it takes a while of them showing a different pattern for me to associate them with something different (so yes, there is a point of return). It impacts sexiness… “Did she just say sexiness?” Yes, I did… It impacts how attractive and appealing we are, man or woman! We attract what we are like, simple as that.

If I’m doing business with someone, I want to know that they are human, that they’re capable of having human connection with me. If they can ask for help and show up authentically, this just tells me I can show up authentically before them. I want to know that they’re problem solvers, who can think out of the box and that being around them will make me a better business person and human being.

Make that decision every time you come up against a difficult situation, choose to be empowered, choose to show your human side, not the chalk outline on the floor!

By | 2017-04-27T15:47:21-07:00 November 6th, 2013|News|